July 24, 2009

my son, part duex

I wrote a little post about El Fuego basically to share that he started a blog all on his very own but I felt it needed a little back story. This led to a bit of negative feedback. Let me explain. I love my son more than I could ever promise in a million years. I celebrate him as often as I can because let's face it, the boy is frickin' brilliant!! He never ceases to amaze me and he makes me laugh all the time. However, to pretend living life with El Fuego, Miss Divine and Petite Artiste (all at the same time) in this 1,680 square foot house 24/7 is a constant walk in the park with birds chirping, children quietly picking posies, and me overseeing my perfect offspring looking ravishing is down right hilarious. And, I've three words for anyone who tries to paint a picture of such....You Be Crazy!

Mr. Hawthorne, my over analyzing husband, thought that writing about seeing a Clinical Psychotherapist wasa bit too private to talk about. And, I totally get where he is coming from, I do. I don't want anyone to think that El Fuego is a terrible kid that I needed to seek professional help to deal with because he's not. Not at all. And, also let me explain that he, himself, did not see the counselor but rather, I did for "parent training". Every child is different in thousands of ways. When you make a baby, it's a total guessing game, a lottery if you will, and you really never know what sort of cocktail you will get at the end. El Fuego happened to come into the world with flaming red hair that literally glowed when he was born. He didn't talk at all until he was three. He is smart as hell. And, as he is approaching the beginning of his 8th year of life, is now just starting to lose his baby teeth.

He's never been a typical kid in many ways however he is very typically male is so many other ways. As a baby, I would attend playgroups with other children his age and I would observe mothers put their children into the crowd of all the other kids with mounds of toys. Watching their children play and fight over super heroes and dolls was normal for them. El Fuego being in the middle of the mix, for me, was not the norm. He would be off reprogramming computers, discovering how to set off the house alarm, setting up TIVO's to record shows, and on occasion calling 911. Now, he never did these things to be malicious but it was very stressful and I would often times leave the playgroups drowning in sweat. Dealing with people who didn't quite understand what it was like to be the parent of El Fuego made for some very uncomfortable situations. Living life with his constant, constant is not always easy.

Although I think El Fuego is pretty darn special, I know I'm probably not alone. There are kids out there just like him with parents who might be reading this shaking their heads in agreement. Seeking a little help for the sake of myself, my son and my family doesn't make me weak or a bad parent. No different than buying a shelf-help book at Barnes and Noble. Raising kids is a tough job!! I just want to be the best at it as I can possibly be.


Carrie said...

I think you're a great parent and kudos to you for knowing when you need to seek some outside advice!

Ignore the haters...

Pat said...

Seeking help...Smart!